NeW LoVe

After many years of sadness, and loneliness
I gave up on the idea of love
So many failed relationships and hurts
My heart turned into stone and rejected any
potential love
In order to protect itself from pain
You walked into my life and
Melted the stone
Teaching me to love again


by Regmister

I'm Sorry
by nathynsangel




I want to give you my sincere appology.
I know that I shouldn't of believed her.
I know that you wouldn't do that to me.
I know that she's been trying to break us up since day one.
I'm not sure why I believed her.
I guess it's because I miss you so freaking much and that I am so vulnerable that I would believe anything at this point and I'm very sorry my miamore.
Please forgive me!1

A hAuNtEd HoUsE

A Haunted House

Virginia Woolf

Whatever hour you woke there was a door shutting. From room to room they went, hand in hand, lifting here, opening there, making sure--a ghostly couple.

"Here we left it," she said. And he added, "Oh, but here tool" "It's upstairs," she murmured. "And in the garden," he whispered. "Quietly," they said, "or we shall wake them."

But it wasn't that you woke us. Oh, no. "They're looking for it; they're drawing the curtain," one might say, and so read on a page or two. "Now they've found it,' one would be certain, stopping the pencil on the margin. And then, tired of reading, one might rise and see for oneself, the house all empty, the doors standing open, only the wood pigeons bubbling with content and the hum of the threshing machine sounding from the farm. "What did I come in here for? What did I want to find?" My hands were empty. "Perhaps its upstairs then?" The apples were in the loft. And so down again, the garden still as ever, only the book had slipped into the grass.

But they had found it in the drawing room. Not that one could ever see them. The windowpanes reflected apples, reflected roses; all the leaves were green in the glass. If they moved in the drawing room, the apple only turned its yellow side. Yet, the moment after, if the door was opened, spread about the floor, hung upon the walls, pendant from the ceiling--what? My hands were empty. The shadow of a thrush crossed the carpet; from the deepest wells of silence the wood pigeon drew its bubble of sound. "Safe, safe, safe" the pulse of the house beat softly. "The treasure buried; the room . . ." the pulse stopped short. Oh, was that the buried treasure?

A moment later the light had faded. Out in the garden then? But the trees spun darkness for a wandering beam of sun. So fine, so rare, coolly sunk beneath the surface the beam I sought always burned behind the glass. Death was the glass; death was between us, coming to the woman first, hundreds of years ago, leaving the house, sealing all the windows; the rooms were darkened. He left it, left her, went North, went East, saw the stars turned in the Southern sky; sought the house, found it dropped beneath the Downs. "Safe, safe, safe," the pulse of the house beat gladly. 'The Treasure yours."

The wind roars up the avenue. Trees stoop and bend this way and that. Moonbeams splash and spill wildly in the rain. But the beam of the lamp falls straight from the window. The candle burns stiff and still. Wandering through the house, opening the windows, whispering not to wake us, the ghostly couple seek their joy.

"Here we slept," she says. And he adds, "Kisses without number." "Waking in the morning--" "Silver between the trees--" "Upstairs--" 'In the garden--" "When summer came--" 'In winter snowtime--" "The doors go shutting far in the distance, gently knocking like the pulse of a heart.

Nearer they come, cease at the doorway. The wind falls, the rain slides silver down the glass. Our eyes darken, we hear no steps beside us; we see no lady spread her ghostly cloak. His hands shield the lantern. "Look," he breathes. "Sound asleep. Love upon their lips."

Stooping, holding their silver lamp above us, long they look and deeply. Long they pause. The wind drives straightly; the flame stoops slightly. Wild beams of moonlight cross both floor and wall, and, meeting, stain the faces bent; the faces pondering; the faces that search the sleepers and seek their hidden joy.

"Safe, safe, safe," the heart of the house beats proudly. "Long years--" he sighs. "Again you found me." "Here," she murmurs, "sleeping; in the garden reading; laughing, rolling apples in the loft. Here we left our treasure--" Stooping, their light lifts the lids upon my eyes. "Safe! safe! safe!" the pulse of the house beats wildly. Waking, I cry "Oh, is this your buried treasure? The light in the heart."

wOmEn iN IsLaM

Aicha Elshabini-Riad

Women in Islam is a multidimensional and a complex topic. The teachings of Islam are based essentially on the Qur'an (God's revelation) and Hadeeth ( elaboration by Prophet Mohammad, peace be upon him ). The Qur'an and the Hadeeth, when properly and unbiasedly understood, provide the basic source for any position or view which is attributed to Islam.

I am not an expert or a religious scholar. I am speaking from my personal convictions and experience as a mother, a wife, and an educator.

It is rare in the west that someone should ask the Muslim woman about her opinion, experiences and feelings as she fulfills her role in life. We as human beings unfortunately tend to misjudge, that which does not meet our standards or that which we do nor understand, yet do we ever stop to think how superficial that may be? Do we ever think to look deeper and learn, and then judge? To the common lay person an uncut diamond may look like a stone, but to a jeweler it is a treasure beyond comparison. Such is Islam to a Muslim and all who care to learn. To set the stage for the subject of Islam and Women, we have to understand two basic Islamic concepts. These two concepts are:

* Islam is not a common religion in the popular understanding of most people, rather Islam is a way of life to be practiced constantly and be reflected in all of our actions. The basis of these actions is the strong belief in God's commands in total obedience to his role. What our Creator commands is not for us, as his creations, to question. If one thinks of these commands, one does not find them insulting to his or her intelligence but rather they serve to enrich and improve humanity's well being. In this context, a Muslim man or woman understands their mutual role in society.
* The status of woman in Islam is something unique, something novel, something that has no similarity in any other system.

Islam acknowledges women as equal partners to men in fulfilling God's purpose for our existence on this earth. Men and women are to complement each other and not to compete with each other. According to Islam, all and each one of us, men and women should only have one reason for doing whatever we do, and that reason is satisfied by God. In Islam, men and women are equal, yet they are not identical. It therefore follows that the

rights and responsibilities of a woman are equal to those of a man but they are not necessarily identical. Equality and sameness are two quite different things. People are not created identical but they are created equal.

Contrary to popular misconception, Islam has long recognized that man and woman are equal, equal spiritually and mentally. It is to Islam's credit that it does not commit hypocrisy and claim them to be identical.

The fact that Islam gives the woman equal rights, but recognizes her as an individual, shows that it takes her into consideration, acknowledges her, and recognizes her independent personality.

What Islam has established for woman is that which suits her nature, gives her full security and protects her against disgraceful circumstances and uncertain channels of life.

God says in His Holy Book Qur'an: "Every soul will be (held) in pledge for its deeds" (Qur'an 74:38). The Qur'an also states that: "... So their Lord accepted their prayers, (saying): I will not suffer to be lost the work of any of you whether male or female. You proceed one from another..." (Qur'an 3:195).

The woman is recognized by Islam as a full and equal partner of man in the procreation of humankind. He is the father; she is the mother and both are essential for life. Islam acknowledges and emphasizes the importance of the woman's role in her family and society as a mother. A mother whose function can not be substituted by any others. The man's function as a father can not be substituted by the woman. Both are there to complement each other. Islam respects both functions and calls on both men and women to fulfill their responsibilities in this regard. Neither men nor women should degrade the other party's function or look down to his or her own.

Among the greatest gifts God has blessed womankind with is the motherhood. God says in His Holy Book, the Qur'an: "Oh Mankind! Obey your Lord, who created you from a single person and creates from like nature his mate, and from both derived countless men and women. Obey God, whom you turn to and obey the wombs that bore you, for God is ever-watching you."

In a single verse God establishes the status and high rank of women as demonstrated by the most beautiful and incomparable role of mother in Islam, the place of the woman in general and mother in particular has no equal.

Like everything, Islam seeks to accomplish in our lives, it harmonizes between the physical, the mental and the spiritual. In other words, it treats the individual as a total being and does not ignore part. That is why rather than push man or woman to the denial of their nature, it instructs them to take advantage, to nurture and develop what God has given to them.

God says in His Holy Book, the Qur'an: "Your Lord has decreed that you worship none save Him, and that you be kind to your parents..." (Qur'an 17:23). Moreover, the Qur'an has a special recommendation for the good treatment of mothers: "And we have enjoined upon man (to be good) to his parents: His mother bears him in weakness upon weakness..." (Qur'an 31:14).

The Prophet Mohammad (peace be upon him) said: "Everyone of you is shepherd and everyone of you shall be asked about those under his (or her) guard. The king is a shepherd and shall be asked about his subjects, the man is shepherd and shall be asked about his family, and the woman is a shepherdess in the house of her husband and shall be asked about those under care."

In fact, the role of mother is given a higher position in importance, in responsibility and in respect, as illustrated in the following story bout the Prophet Mohammad (peace be upon him). A man came to the Prophet (peace be upon him) and asked him to advise him on whom should he takes into consideration. The Prophet (peace be upon him) answered "your mother", the man said "then", the Prophet (peace be upon him) said "your mother", the man said "then", the Prophet (peace be upon him) said "your mother", the man said "then", the Prophet (peace be upon him) said "your father". and yet again the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "Paradise lies at the feet of mothers" which means that the woman's role as a mother is a sacred one. Islam has emphasized this fact in great fashion by instructing us to respect and care for our mothers for more than what we do for our fathers.

In the light of the important function that mother serves, Islam has gone so far as to advice parents to pay extra attention and devote time and efforts in the up bringing and raising of their daughters. The Prophet Mohammad (peace be upon him) said: "Whoever takes care of three daughters will enter Paradise." So a man asked how about two daughters, the Prophet (peace be upon him) said "he, too, will enter Paradise," so the man asked how about one daughter and the Prophet (peace be upon him) answered "he, too, will enter paradise."

The role of mother in Islam is no less in importance or social impact than the role of man as protector and provider. Islam has given the wife all what it takes to protect her rights and to create the adequate environment for a healthy family life. In an Islamic family, the man is responsible for supporting his family's needs. If the wife has income, it is her privilege to decide what to do with it independently. Family related decisions are to be discussed jointly.

The role of mother in Islam is so majestic and noble that women in general and mother in particular have been called the "School of the Nation". From our mothers new generations have sprung forth and from today's mothers, new generations will spring forth again. A blessing and trust given to us to nurture, protect, guide and educate. The first seeds of knowledge and the first knowledge of God is planted and developed at home under the guidance and loving care of the mother. It is a role God has gifted her with the capabilities to accomplish, the sense of giving and ability to inspire a sense of belonging.

The torn families of our days, and our social problems can be all avoided if the motherhood is taken as a serious responsibility and a respectable duty. Islam does not ask of the women to stay at home, have children, and be limited to raising them. Islam emphasizes the importance of this task to a healthy family and a healthy society. If a woman is capable of taking other tasks of life without abandoning such an important and vital task, she is not only allowed to do so, but she is requested to do just that. Every person, man or a woman, is requested to do his utmost to be a positive productive useful member of his or her own society. Talking about my personal experience, God have blessed me with the ability to be a caring mother of two young boys, a house wife with a content husband, and a productive career as a university professor. I do all that because God gave me the capability to do them all, not because I am in competition with any body, and not to prove that women can do it. I do it all in the way of God, and for his sake. There is no feeling of being threatened or a need to compete. Each man and woman recognizes their capabilities and their limitations.

So much can be said about the rights of women in Islam. But to be fair, we would not be talking about that if it were not for the other societies which denied women of their fair share of rights and equality. Islam gives women this fair share. It is all logical and obvious, and can be summarized on one simple statement. In the words of Prophet Mohammad (peace be upon him) "Women are men's mothers, sisters, and daughters".

iSLaM iS bEaUtiFuL

Islam is beautiful

We pray when we are scared
When we are worried
When we are in pain
When we are in need
When we are in grieve
When we are lost
And need to be found
When we are lonely
And Allah have been there for us
In all times
Allah listened and helped
But why don’t we share that good time
That Allah gave
Why we forget to thank Allah
Why we just remember in our bad times
We are a generation that surely needs to think
Think of that we do
Think of our steps
All the mistakes
Before it’s too late
Tooba is easy
If you really mean it
Islam is beautiful
Islam is wonderful

aliyah aliyah

tHiS iS mY LiFe

Life defines in Metabolism,
In reproduction,
we make our miniature selves,
our look alikes
In the power of adaptation,
like what is in now,
What is fashionable,
how I blend with all of you
How I mimic you,
how I become a clown to you,

Life in being nice
This is my life A short and a merry one
This my life In the middle of my own life
To life,
a life,
in the hope of discovering the meaning of my life,
My speech my poetry
Come to life with me
To the life,
for the life of one like me,
Not taking this life in my own hands,
Never,
never,
To life,
this is life
As big as life
as large as life is large
In resiliency,
in elasticity
Animations, cartooning, animate,
I vivify
I vilify
I quicken
I liken
The life force in my life’s functions
Drawn from life
to life drawn
Dream to life a life full of dreams
This liveliness, this sparkle
This effervescence of life,
this bubbling life like wine
This sprightliness like soft
Drink like energy drinks
This verve,
this vigor
this vivacity
Of life to life as big as life
My life
This is my life
This me I am life
I am energy
i am in this poem trying to run
away from everything in my life,
running in life
to life and life,
because of life,
for life.

RIC S. BASTASA

Renungan Hidup

SETIAP kali ke selatan tanah air, saya sukar melupakan suatu
peristiwa yang berlaku semasa saya berkhidmat di sana kira-kira 20 tahun lalu.
Saya masih ingat, bulan Mac 1980, kira-kira pukul 10.30 malam, saya
mendapat panggilan telefon mengatakan ada kematian di kawasan
perumahan berhampiran tempat kediaman saya.
Memandangkan malam sudah hampir larut, saya menangguhkan niat
menziarah Allahyarham. Saya mengambil keputusan menunggu sehingga esok pagi.
Saya tidak begitu mengenali Allahyarham. Apa yang diberitahu beliau
seorang wanita yang masih muda dan belum berumahtangga. Bagaimanapun saya
memang kenal baik dengan ibunya. Orangnya baik dan lemah lembut, senang
dibawa berbincang malah tidak pernah bermusuhan dengan sesiapa.
Keesokannya, kira-kira pukul 8.00 pagi saya pun bergegas ke rumah
Allahyarham. Niat hati hanya untuk berziarah saja kerana kebetulan
waktu itu saya sedang hamil. Lagipun di situ terdapat seorang pengurus
jenazah yang memang saya kenali.
Sebaik tiba di sana orang ramai telah memenuhi ruang tamu. Segala
persiapan telah di-buat. Kain kapan, kemenyan, kapur barus dan sebagainya siap
sedia di sisi jenazah.
Saya lihat semua tetamu sedang khusyuk membaca surah Yasin. Hati saya
tertanya-tanya di mana pengurus jenazah? Dia tidak kelihatan,
sedangkan rumahnya hanya selang beberapa pintu dari rumah Allahyarham.
Masa terus berlalu, pengurus jenazah yang bernama Mak Siti itu tidak
muncul-muncul. Jam di dinding menunjukkan pukul 12.00 tengah hari.
Hati mula tertanya-tanya, siapa akan menguruskan jenazah ini?
Kesian...
Sudah lebih 12 jam jenazah terbiar. Saya menghampiri ibu Allahyarham.
"Mak cik, mana Mak Siti? Hari dah tinggi. Dia tak sampai lagi?" saya
bertanya.
"Entahlah ustazah, mak cik telefon dia tadi. Katanya dia datang lewat
sikit, ada hal mustahak," kata ibu Allahyarham separuh kesal.
"Jenazah tak elok dibiarkan lama-lama. Saya bukan tak nak tolong tapi
mak cik tengoklah keadaan saya ni..." kata saya kepadanya sambil menunjuk
ke arah perut.
"Tak apa ustazah, makcik faham. Mak cik akan cuba minta tolong orang
kampung sebelah," jawab ibu Allahyarham lagi.
Salah seorang waris keluarga itu terus ke kampung sebelah, meminta
pertolongan. Lebih kurang setengah jam kemudian dia muncul kembali.
"Macam mana? Ada tak orangnya?" tanya ibu Allahyarham.
"Tak ada. Dia ke Kuala Lumpur semalam... ke rumah anaknya," kata
lelaki itu.
"Macam mana ni ustazah?" katanya kepada saya dengan wajah sedih.
Lantas dia memeluk saya sambil menahan sedu.
"Bersabar mak cik. Semua yang berlaku mesti ada hikmah di sebaliknya.
Kita tunggulah Mak Siti, kalau tak ada juga baru kita cari ikhtiar lain,"
kata saya cuba mententeramkannya.
Kami mengambil keputusan menunggu saja kedatangan Mak Siti. Hari
semakin petang. Jarum jam terus berputar daripada pukul 1.00 ke pukul 2.00
dan akhirnya mencecah 3.00. Seorang demi seorang yang berada di ruang tamu meninggalkan rumah Allahyarham. Semakin lama semakin ramai yang meminta diri untuk
pulang.Melihat keadaan yang semakin lengang, ibu Allahyarham kelihatan serba
tak kena. Tentulah dia sedih memikirkan tiada siapa untuk menguruskan
jenazah anak kesayangannya.
"Macam mana ni ustazah, jam dah hampir 4.00 petang. Bayang Mak Siti
pun tak nampak," rintih ibu Allahyarham sambil air matanya berlinangan.
"Kesian saya tengok mak cik. Tak ada siapa yang nak uruskan. Macam
nilah mak cik... saya bukanlah nak ambil tahu hal keluarga mak cik, tapi
ada tak apa-apa kelakuan Allahyarham yang mengecilkan hati mak cik?" tanya
saya spontan. Sebenarnya saya sendiri tak tahu bagaimana saya dapat
mengeluarkan perkataan demikian pada waktu itu.
"Kenapa ustazah tanya macam ni?" katanya agak terperanjat.
"Tak ada apa-apa. Cuma... kalau ada perilaku Allahyarham semasa
hayatnya membuat mak cik kecil hati, maafkan ajalah dia. Mungkin Itu akan
dapat meringankan bebannya," kata saya bersungguh-sungguh.
Mendengar kata-kata itu, ibu Allahyarham terus menangis teresak-esak
lantas memeluk saya. Saya tergamam seketika. Mulut saya terkunci.
"Memang mak cik merasa kecil hati dengannya. Dia tu suka melawan,
sepatah yang mak cik cakap, sepuluh dia balas. Puas adik-beradik nasihatkan
dia.Tapi dia tetap macam tu.
"Lagipun dia ni degil, tak pernah langsung mendengar nasihat mak cik.
Apa yang mak cik cakap semuanya dibangkang," katanya dengan linangan air
mata.
Menurut ibu Allahyarham lagi, walaupun demikian anaknya amat bersopan
santun dan mesra dengan orang lain. Tidak pernah dia meninggikan
suara jika berbual dengan sahabat atau saudara-mara.
"Dengan mak cik saja dia begitu.. Itu yang mak cik kecil hati.
Kadangkala mak cik terfikir di mana silap mak cik," tambahnya dalam esak tangis.
Malah kata ibu Allahyarham, anaknya seorang yang taat kepada suruhan
Allah.
Segala amal ibadat sama ada yang wajib atau sunat tidak pernah
ditinggalkan.
"Sampai sekarang mak cik kecil hati dengan dia. Sebab ni ke, tak ada
orang nak sempurnakan jenazahnya, ustazah?" tanya ibu Allahyarham sambil
mengesat mata.
"Yang sudah tu sudahlah. Sekarang mak cik maafkanlah segala kesalahan
dan kesilapan itu. Insya-Allah segalanya akan berjalan lancar dan
jenazahnya akan disempurnakan dengan cepat," kata saya lagi. Sebaik saja saya
berkata demikian, ibu Allahyarham terus mengangkat tangan berdoa sambil
berkata,"Ya Allah, ya Tuhanku. Aku ampunkan segala kesalahan, kesilapan dan
dosa anakku ini. Lapangkanlah anakku dari segala seksaan." Dia kemudian
terus membuka kain penutup jenazah. Ditenung wajah anaknya agak lama.
Lebih kurang lima minit kemudian, tiba-tiba terdengar suara Mak Siti
memberi salam di muka pintu.
''Maaflahhhh, terlambat. Saya ke pekan, ada hal sikit tadi. Tak
sangka pula susah benar dapat teksi, tak macam selalu," kata Mak Siti sambil
bersalaman dengan tetamu-tetamu yang ada. Saya pandang wajah ibu Allahyarham.
Jauh di sudut hati, saya berbisik: "Alangkah besarnya keagunganMu, ya Allah.
Enam belas jam jenazah terbiar tetapi selepas dosanya diampunkan ibu,
mudah saja Allah lorongkan kebaikan."
Memandangkan semua sudah tersedia, Mak Siti terus memulakan tugasnya.
Saya juga turut membantu serba sedikit. Tidak sampai satu jam,
segala-galanya daripada mandi, kapan dan sembahyang jenazah siap disempurnakan.
Jenazah Allahyarham selamat dikebumikan di tanah perkuburan
berhampiran selepas azan Asar pada hari itu juga.